It doesn’t matter if you’re as evil as a murderer or righteous as a Prophet, God has set aside for you your portion of difficulty in life.
I learned a valuable lesson yesterday night, a night I’ll never forget. I forgive whoever it was but I ask Allah that He makes it fall back on them someday.
We were going to get my husband’s blackberry fixed nearby the house because it got wet at sea few days ago and so we were walking towards the car. I looked to where the boat is just to see if our baby is there and my heart just felt pain instantly. I saw her oar was loose. I walked closer, frantically looking for the hole, I’m pressing the boat down to hear for air escaping, I’m going all around her looking, checking her air valves – Maybe someone opened them. Maybe they were just loose. Maybe it was too hot. Maybe it was the speargun. Maybe maybe maybe! Where is the damn hole?!! I know someone did this, there has to be a hole. But I lied to myself and just pretended that we just had to pump her and we’ll be at sea the next day.
I walked back to the car, telling myself it was gonna be alright. Nothing happened. We’re still going to sea everyday, every weekend, everytime we can. Our baby is alright.
“It’s here!” No. No. No. It can’t be. It’s something else.
My husband found it. My husband saw it. And I saw it too. I removed it and it was a tip of a pen. Some !@#$%^&*@#$%^!&* had punctured our boat. The devil made 3 holes. They were tiny, so tiny you couldn’t really see it. So tiny, you wouldn’t think air had a chance of escaping.
And so my world turned hot. Everytime something like this happens, something that just hits me by surprise, I feel a steaming hot towel (like those amazing ones Emirates gives you before boarding) wrapped around me. It’s a strange feeling I get when I’m angry, sad, shocked all at the same time.
Just that morning me and my client were talking about what a rascal she is and how much she’s put us through – the car break-in, the engine failure which left us stranded at sea, the phones. And for some reason, everytime something happens (because of the boat), it’s always on the day of Lesley’s class. I told her “I wonder what else is next?”
Didn’t think ‘next’ would happen so soon.
And so it happened. Hubster kept reminding me that it can be fixed. But still! I want him/them/her dead! Urghhhhhhhh. With all the effort, time, money, goverment offices….. Ya Allah ya Rabb!
By the time I was about to go to sleep that night, I decided to forgive whoever it was. But I still want them to feel what we felt!
One thing I did learn though, is to never ever harm anybody be it physically or by words directly or indirectly or by a freaking pen!!!!!! Because it hurts. It hurts so bad. The hole was so tiny, so so tiny yet it effected us greatly – we could have not seen the holes and sunk mid sea. And you never know what people are going through in life, so speak and do things wisely. I remember a hadith that my teacher, Shaykh Hussein Yee, always use to say, he made us memorize it and today I finally understand it’s true meaning. Hadith #32 Ibn Majah:
“لا ضرر و لا ضرار”
“There should be neither harming nor reciprocating harm.”
Explanation of this Hadeeth:
Ibn Habeeb (rahimahullaah) said : “According to the scholars of the Arabic language, ad-darar refers to the noun and ad-diraar refers to the action/verb, and so the meaning of ‘no darar’ is that none of you should harm any other with something that they have not harmed you with first. And the meaning of ‘no diraar’ is that none of you should harm any other at all.”
Al-Muhsinee (rahimahullaah) said: “Ad-darar is that by which you attain benefit, but in it is harm for your neighbour” and other scholars have said : “Ad-darar and ad-diraar are similar to al-qatal [murder] and al-qitaal [fighting one another], so ad-darar is that you harm one who has not harmed you, while ad-diraar is that you harm someone who harmed you, but in a way that is not responding equally or taking revenge rightfully.”
And this is similar to the statement of Rasulullah sal Allahu alayhi wasallam “Return the Trusts given to you, to those who entrusted them to you, and do not betray the one who betrays you” [Hasan Ghareeb, narrated by at-Tirmidhee]. And the meaning of this according to some of the ‘ulamaa is that one must not betray the one who betrays, after one has already taken revenge or sought justice for his betrayal. And so it is as though the forbiddance here is upon initiating an injustice or harm, while the one who seeks revenge with the equal of what he has been harmed with, and who takes his Right, then he is not considered to be a betrayer. Rather, the betrayer is he who takes that which does not belong to him or more than that which is rightfully his.
And the Jurists [fuqahaa’] have differed over the one who refuses to fulfill the rights/trusts that others have upon him, such that the entruster forcibly takes the wealth that he had entrusted to him. So some of the scholars have said : “It is not correct for him to [forcibly] take what is his right due to what is apparent from his sal Allahu alayhi wasallam statement [“Return the Trusts, and do not betray the one who betrays you”].
On the other hand, other scholars have said : “It is permissible for him to take revenge from the one who has betrayed him, and to forcibly take what is due to him from the hand of his betrayer” and they use as proof the hadeeth narrated by ‘Aaishah (radiAllaahu anhaa) regarding the incident involving Hind and her husband Abu Sufyaan, wherein Hind said to the Prophet (sallAllaahu alayhi wa sallam) “O Messenger of Allaah ! Verily Abu Sufyaan is a stingy/tight-fisted man, and he does not give to me what is sufficient for myself and my child, unless I take it from him secretly.” So the Prophet (sallAllaahu alayhi wa sallam) replied : “Take [from his wealth] what is sufficient for you and your child, but with justice” [narrated by Muslim]. And in this issue the fuqahaa’ have mentioned many points and fine issues that cannot be mentioned here.
And what is correct from an examination of all the evidences is that it is not correct for someone to harm his brother, whether he has harmed him or not, except if he avenges himself to the extent that Justice allows him to [ie. equally], and this is not considered to be oppression nor harm, as long at is in a fashion that the Sunnah makes permissible for him.
And Allaah knows best.
*Credits to Islamic Network. May Allah accept their sincere efforts.
Dear whoever who punctured my boat,
I forgive you. But I want you to feel the same way we felt. Don’t worry, I don’t know who you are – you’re blessed I don’t. But Allah does and only He can satisfy me.
Hope I don’t find you.